6 Sep 2007, ST
A young mother infected with Aids finds the courage to aim for a better life for her daughter
By Loh Keng Fatt
HER name is Ana. Infected with HIV at birth, she learns early to hide her ailment from others. But she gets to know a boy and, at 17, becomes a mother.
Her life story of standing up to tough times is recounted by Jenna Bush, daughter of United States President George W. Bush, in Ana's Story: A Journey Of Hope.
The two met when Bush, 25, was on an internship with Unicef in Latin America and the Caribbean, and came into contact with young people infected with Aids.
Here is an excerpt from the book, which zooms in on Ana's desire to do better for herself and her daughter, and the difficult decision she has to make regarding the father of her child, the Aids-infected Berto.
'Things became more and more difficult between Ana and Berto. He had left the hospital and returned to the hogar (home) but they hadn't spent much time together.
She always had to visit him because it was difficult for him to get around. She felt bad for him, sad he was in pain but she also felt lonely watching other couples walk hand in hand with their children.
She was surrounded by families but although Berto was the father of her baby, she did not feel they were a family of their own.
Ana's feelings for him were unpredictable. When she thought of the love they shared in the beginning of their relationship, she wanted to be with him forever.
When she thought of Beatriz, she wasn't sure that he could be the type of father that she wanted for her daughter.
When they were together, he seemed more interested in Ana than Beatriz; it seemed as if he wanted to be a boyfriend, not a father. Ana wanted a family for her daughter. She wanted to give her everything she hadn't had.
In many ways, he was still her best friend but she didn't have the same feelings for him that she used to. The passion, the attraction, the butterflies had flown away.
Instead, she found herself thinking of Guillermo. Berto was and would always be Beatriz's papa but Ana knew what she had to do. She didn't want to hurt Berto but she had to tell him how she felt. Her palms sweating, she dialled the number of the hogar.
'Hola, Berto,' she said nervously. 'Hola, Ana. What's up? How is Beatriz?' he asked.
'Beatriz is good; I am good too,' she said as she cleared her throat. 'Berto, there is something I need to talk with you about. I know I've been acting weird.'
'Ana, it's fine,' he said. 'I understand.'
'No, Berto, it's not okay.' Ana paused, unsure of how to say it. Then she blurted out. 'You will always be Beatriz's papa but I don't think we are working as a couple.'
There was silence on the phone line.
'I wasn't expecting this at all,' he said. 'I don't want this. I don't want Beatriz to live the life that I have lived, without a mama and a papa. I am her father.
'I would do anything to make this work, to be a family, a real one,' he said.
'Berto, you can't. You don't have a job. You still live in the hogar. You need to be there and Beatriz and I can't live there with you. How can we be a family when we can't live together?' she said. 'I'm sorry but my feelings have changed too.'
'Okay,' was all he said, then he hung up. She felt a combination of grief and relief. She didn't regret what she had done but she did regret that Berto would not be able to be the kind of father Beatriz needed.
Ana and Berto still wanted the same future - one with a loving and supportive family - but she no longer saw the two of them living that dream together.'
-------------------------------
# Ana's Story: A Journey Of Hope is available in major bookshops at $28.
# Books For The Soul is a weekly column that highlights books which move, comfort or inspire.
A young mother infected with Aids finds the courage to aim for a better life for her daughter
By Loh Keng Fatt
HER name is Ana. Infected with HIV at birth, she learns early to hide her ailment from others. But she gets to know a boy and, at 17, becomes a mother.
Her life story of standing up to tough times is recounted by Jenna Bush, daughter of United States President George W. Bush, in Ana's Story: A Journey Of Hope.
The two met when Bush, 25, was on an internship with Unicef in Latin America and the Caribbean, and came into contact with young people infected with Aids.
Here is an excerpt from the book, which zooms in on Ana's desire to do better for herself and her daughter, and the difficult decision she has to make regarding the father of her child, the Aids-infected Berto.
'Things became more and more difficult between Ana and Berto. He had left the hospital and returned to the hogar (home) but they hadn't spent much time together.
She always had to visit him because it was difficult for him to get around. She felt bad for him, sad he was in pain but she also felt lonely watching other couples walk hand in hand with their children.
She was surrounded by families but although Berto was the father of her baby, she did not feel they were a family of their own.
Ana's feelings for him were unpredictable. When she thought of the love they shared in the beginning of their relationship, she wanted to be with him forever.
When she thought of Beatriz, she wasn't sure that he could be the type of father that she wanted for her daughter.
When they were together, he seemed more interested in Ana than Beatriz; it seemed as if he wanted to be a boyfriend, not a father. Ana wanted a family for her daughter. She wanted to give her everything she hadn't had.
In many ways, he was still her best friend but she didn't have the same feelings for him that she used to. The passion, the attraction, the butterflies had flown away.
Instead, she found herself thinking of Guillermo. Berto was and would always be Beatriz's papa but Ana knew what she had to do. She didn't want to hurt Berto but she had to tell him how she felt. Her palms sweating, she dialled the number of the hogar.
'Hola, Berto,' she said nervously. 'Hola, Ana. What's up? How is Beatriz?' he asked.
'Beatriz is good; I am good too,' she said as she cleared her throat. 'Berto, there is something I need to talk with you about. I know I've been acting weird.'
'Ana, it's fine,' he said. 'I understand.'
'No, Berto, it's not okay.' Ana paused, unsure of how to say it. Then she blurted out. 'You will always be Beatriz's papa but I don't think we are working as a couple.'
There was silence on the phone line.
'I wasn't expecting this at all,' he said. 'I don't want this. I don't want Beatriz to live the life that I have lived, without a mama and a papa. I am her father.
'I would do anything to make this work, to be a family, a real one,' he said.
'Berto, you can't. You don't have a job. You still live in the hogar. You need to be there and Beatriz and I can't live there with you. How can we be a family when we can't live together?' she said. 'I'm sorry but my feelings have changed too.'
'Okay,' was all he said, then he hung up. She felt a combination of grief and relief. She didn't regret what she had done but she did regret that Berto would not be able to be the kind of father Beatriz needed.
Ana and Berto still wanted the same future - one with a loving and supportive family - but she no longer saw the two of them living that dream together.'
-------------------------------
# Ana's Story: A Journey Of Hope is available in major bookshops at $28.
# Books For The Soul is a weekly column that highlights books which move, comfort or inspire.
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